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Today I learned about Basic English. Basic English is an actual constructed language that is made up of 850 of the most simple and commonly used English words. It came out in a 1930 book by Charles Kay Ogden, and is used to teach people English quickly or to translate complex books for users in many different countries. There is actually a whole separate Wikipedia written in Simple English, which is a more complex variation of Basic English. It just occurs to me that I should have tried to write this post using nothing but Basic English, but really it's too late for that now.

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Friday I learned that Jason Collett will be opening up for the Feist concert in the 18th. I got his album off iTunes but I haven't really had a chance to listen to it yet. Hopefully I can do that tomorrow while I'm working.

Saturday I learned how house numbers are assigned. Like, when you're driving down the road it's not usually like 265 Elm Street, 267, 269, etc. They tend to jump around more. Well, the answer is not super simple and it actually depends on where you live. In some places there is an assigned center of the city or county or whatever and the house number has to do with the distance from that center. Some places, a stretch of road is assigned a number (say 5000) and then house numbers are assigned for their distance along that road (so 5015 and 5045 are closer together than the next neighbor, 5095). Sometimes builders might skip numbers on larger pieces of land in case it gets divided up later. It really varies.

Today I learned about Mormon missionaries. I see them at work kind of regularly and we actually have 2 who volunteer there. This is, like, serious business. They have a schedule that they follow six days a week, specific clothes and nametags to wear, etc. A lot of them have to learn a new language in 2-3 months. They have another missionary who is their companion, and they are never supposed to be apart from their companion throughout the day except for bathroom time. They can write to their parents weekly, but can generally only call home on Christmas and Mother's Day; these missions usually last 18 months to 2 years, and these are college-aged kids. Man alive. I literally could not do something like that without complaining nonstop from start to finish. But, that's because I'm a bad person and I'm going to hell, which should not be surprising to anyone.

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Today I learned how to blow my nose. Don't blow too hard, support your back if you're coughing or sneezing. That's great. I will continue to ignore that advice and blow my nose until my brain hurts and I see spots, as I have been doing for the past several days. Seriously, I have weird pains and I smell blood. That's ok, right?

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Uh, I thought I did my blog yesterday but I guess not. Yesterday I learned a whole mess of crap about using formulas in Excel. I learned all this at Using Formulas In Excel. I am really stupid with Excel because I never use it, but the trainings through my work are actually somewhat helpful. And I used one of our online training things for the first time; they are pretty decent.

Today I learned about the pound sign (#). Why is it called the pound sign, I wondered. Because it means "pounds," that's why. I honestly did not know that. You can be all, "That girl needs to eat a cheeseburger, she looks like she weighs 80#." No one does that, do they? I mean, I call it the pound sign, but I don't use it for pounds. It means number to me, like, "#5 was the hardest question on the quiz." The Wikipedia article is like really snotty about it; it repeats over and over how only PARTS OF THE US AND CANADA use the term "pound sign" and that no on in the U.K. would ever, ever call it that, okay?

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Saturday I learned about the common cold. I learned a lot about it. I don't know what to say. One thing is that you get a cold by getting the germs in your nose or eyes, and then they multiply in the lining of your nose and throat.

Sunday I learned Merriam Webster's word of the day, "fata morgana." Now that is one I had never heard.

Today I learned how to do the money at my job. Uh, I don't know how to describe "doing the money" to those that don't work there, but anyway. I was actually shown last week but I did it today for the first time on my own, so I'm counting it.

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Today I learned what a pavlova is. A pavlova is a giant cake-sized meringue that you decorate with whipped cream and fruit. (Side note: my new huge pet peeve is people who write "whip cream." It is not "whip cream." It is cream that has been whipped: whipped cream.) It gets crispy on the outside but stays moist on the inside. The pavlova comes from New Zealand and does not particularly look like something that I would want to eat.

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Today I learned about my new Sunday work location. I learned how they do things, where things are, etc. Plus I met a few people. That's boring, I know. Sorry.